The CuriousPages Sketchbook

Baldness and hair colouring

Last night I dreamt that I was looking round at various types of bald-headed men. I seemed to be in a town, or at least a district of a town, that was populated entirely by bald-headed men of every variety. I was looking round at them wondering if my head resembled any of them. They seemed to be like a different species, but they seemed to be enjoying life, as far as I could tell, so I was thinking that perhaps all would not be lost (in the hypothetical situation of me ever becoming bald).

In the dream, I think I was recalling a passing remark that my sister had made a few weeks ago. I was sat on my mother’s sofa and my sister walked by, glanced down at the top of my head and said, ‘Seems to be getting thinner,’ in the way that only family, or young children, or the inhumanly insensitive can do.

And in this dream, I think I must have been recalling this, because I was looking at some men with various degrees of thinness in the thatch over the top and back of their heads and wondering which one, if any, I might have resembled, or might come to resemble.

This reminds me of the time I started using Just for Men hair colouring. My niece was sitting on my lap, or standing right in front of my, I can’t remember which, and she looked up at my hair and said, ‘You’ve got white hair.’ A week later, I found myself exploring the hair-colouring isle in Sainsbury’s.

Which was another eye-opener. There was an entire isle of women’s hair colouring. I stopped and picked up a few boxes and read them. They described lengthy, complex procedures, taking around an hour. The isle was about thirty yards long, and the choice of produce was daunting. I was overwhelmed. I turned the corner to the men’s department and there was one product. It said to simply apply it like shampoo, wait five minutes, wash it out and it’s done. They’ve got men sussed.

P.S. I am not in the least bit bald.


25 March 2008



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