The CuriousPages Sketchbook

Samuel Pam’s Salvation

A short story. This was inspired by a spam email that I received. For months, like most people, I had been receiving numerous daily spam emails concerning penis enlargement, sources for Viagra pills, and other sex related spams. Nothing unusual there. But then I started to received an entertaining variation on the usual email. First, these emails are usually composed by people whose native language is not English, and the mistakes they make are entertaining. But this new variation included a paragraph of text that seemed to be made up of random samples from various English literature. And it was the randomness of this that I found inspiring. Here’s the text of the email that first interested me:

FROM:Grippi Janik
SUBJECT:Ribbonfish
MESSAGE:

God dag,
Real men!
Millionss of people accross the world have already tested THIS and ARE asking their girlfriendds feel brand new sexual ssensations! YOU are the best in bed, aren’t you ?Girls!Deveelop your sexual reelationship and get even MORE pleasurre! Make your boyfriennd a gift! [link to site offering pills for penis enlargement]

To do what she didn’t want. And mrs. Sleightercan beard opened, before any sound could come forth, lemons.a side of lamba souc’t pig.two couple of understood that they intend to reside permanently in murder cases, as you know, charles, the obvious halfsuggested curves, such utter obstinacy that what i’ll have!33 that is exactly what you will the bystanders contemplate the two princes with a river of lava on even the best of agriculturists, bless you, lady, upon his tongue, were strangely absolute. Typical. Modest and moral and safe. and caught her bridle. She struck at him with yvonne? Exclaimed benton in a changed voice, as feasting royally on air and sunshine and spring graceful figure with the sloping shoulders, the.

 

Initially, I’d thought I might use parts of this final paragraph to begin a poem. But then the idea came to me to create a short story using this whole activity of spam emails concerning penis enlargement and sexual performance, since this idea seemed amusing.

I think the starting point was the notion that the spam messages would come from people that the protagonist met in public. People would get close to him, when standing in queues and in other such situations, and would whisper in his ear a spam message, such as ‘Don’t put up with a tiny pecker’. And the protagonist’s days would be plagued by people coming up to him and giving him such spam messages. The plot, characters, and situations developed from there.

 

Read the full story: Samuel Pam’s Salvation.

 

15 March 2008

 

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